The price is steep, even in death

It has been years since I encountered a loss in the family but the trauma, pain and longing remain to this day.

I remember receiving a death text notice from a family friend as early as 6.13 in the morning… years ago.

Months ago, my friends and I visited a wake of a college buddy whose family member died of another illness.

My father's long battle with liver cirrhosis lasted for almost two years while my travel buddy’s brother's fight against pancreatitis lasted for a year and two weeks.

Back to the memory lane of having to hear the words “sorry to hear about your loss,” “at least he finally rested,” so on and so forth.
But he put so neatly: “Nag report na siya kay Lord after a year of fight.”
Years ago, as he painfully watched his younger brother's struggle against life inside the Intensive Care Unit of the Quirino Memorial Hospital, my comforting words was: “It's a long wait, but it should not sadden you. God decides on the culmination of any human life. When your Jojo is ready it will be serenely.”
And so at 2 a.m. one Friday, another life was called.

Believe me when I say, I know the feeling of having to see someone suffer and fight against this beautiful life because I was a witness on death when it called my father.

Isn't it hard to pray to God to take someone's life even if its purpose is to lessen the suffering and pain? And knowing that in the end He is still the one who decides when is the best time, His will we should always respect but do not always understand.

Apart from the pain of seeing a love one suffer, finding money to pay hospital bills and medicines is another problem.
What is more costly is it living or dying?
Let me talk about the cost of dying, with my father as an example.

Phase I
Before death:
Check-up + medicine prescription = money.
Passport for his check-ups: The powerful HMO card.
You may not pay for the check-up but you are obliged to buy all the medicines prescribed by the doctor.
How would we cope with the P250-P300 check-up fee and the maintenance medicines?
In short, my father was just lucky that he had an extended lease on his life courtesy of the HMO card.

Phase II
Hospitalization + medicine prescription = money.
First, our family had a verbal tussle as my father refused to be brought to the hospital for the nth time. Dehydrated and too weak to do battle with the tears shed by the family, he finally agreed to be confined.
The tiger in the house finally succumbed to our pleas and stayed for almost a month.
It was a montage on the usual patient-in-the-hospital-fighting-to-live drama in real life.
I will not talk on how he fought to live from the Intensive Care Unit (ICU) to Cardio Care Unit (CCU) to his hospital room, and vice-versa, not to mention how he gave those attending nurses and doctors’ headaches.
Now let's categorize the scenarios before dying:
Category I: the sick or the dying did not make it to the hospital, died at home or somewhere else.
Category II: the sick or the dying eventually expired while being rush to hospital or
Category III: the sick made it to hospital but unfortunately expired while being treated.
My father was classified under the third category. His heart surrendered while being treated but according to his death certificate, the immediate cause of death was CRF secondary to gouty nephropathy. Antecedent cause: chronic atrial fibrillation.
Underlying cause: liver cirrhosis.
Whatever those above mentioned medical terms mean, I just know one thing, my father died because he was too tired to fight death and that God was just around the corner that day waiting to be acknowledged.
However, before he gasped his last breath - there was one final request, this time not about taking care of our mother.
He has another love, we knew about this all along.
Naah there was no other woman but his beloved fighting cocks. But this is another story. Now let's go to the third phase of the cost of dying.

Phase III
The wake = money.
For sure when a family member dies, the rest of the family members argue about what coffin to buy, what color, what services, how many days for interment, where to be buried, is cremation an option? how much? etc. etc.
The death certificate alone costs about P100 and needed before you can do any transactions.
Here's the breakdown:
Coffin = P7,500 (cheapest)
P150,000 (expensive).
Flowers = Pxxxxx
Food = Pxxxxxx
Accommodation (my registered nurse sister and I called this board and lodging) = (depends if its non-air or air-conditioned).

In 2003, our family bargained for a P40,000 coffin from its original price of P55,000 with P2,500 a night in an air-conditioned accommodation – the last hurray in paying respects to the man who taught us more than just being streetsmart.
The cheapest “coffin-wake” package is about P7,500, a simple coffin made of ordinary plywood, with free three nights accommodation at a funeral home.
So, after everything's settled from what attire the dead will wear, to the color of the coffin, flowers, etc comes the final phase.

Phase IV
Burial = lot in a cemetery + payment for the cemetery lot diggers + food after the interment = (again) money, your last stroke.
What transpired during the wake will be totally different during the burial. This includes finding a decent cemetery.
But as I said, nothing is free. Even for the digging of soil (which we know would be the same soil that will cover the coffin) will cost you.
Yes, you have to pay for it. It is not included in the package whether you get two or three or four lots in the cemetery. To give you an idea, it's just like acquiring a high-end new mobile phone.
So, there you are an estimate on the cost of the dying.
Life they say is a finite lease and all you have to do is make the most of it.
Those who said goodbye to their leased life finally got their ultimate vacation in His paradise, a place where everything in the garden is lovely.
There they can talk about anything under the sun without having to worry about beating the deadlines.
Dying is ain't good as living but for me death is just another life... a life not having to think on the cost of dying.

Integrity in action

Back view





Sabi ng katabi nya cute daw boxers niya.

And then... side view ... with a smile.

>>> this photo by AKP Images

Si Inday (Part II)

Ating gunitain ang iba pang mga nasabi ni Inday tungkol sa mga bagay-bagay sa buhay.


Sagot ni Inday nung tanungin ni Sir kung bakit my rashes si Jun-Jun..

"Allergens triggered the immune response. Eosinophilic migration occurs to the rxn site and release of chemotactic and anaphylotoxin including histamine and prostaglandins. These substances result to incomplete circulation to the site promoting redness."


Ang isda bow!

Amo: "Inday, bumili ka nga ng mga isda. Ay oo nga pala, inglesera ka na ngayon. Would you please buy many fishes for this week's meals?"

Inday: "Judging by your statement, I believe you meant a variety of fish. The term 'fishes' although rarely used, connotes a plethora of different kinds of the said gilled aquatic creatures. But the more pressing questions before I go to the wet market would be: "What type of fish? Fillet or not? Frozen of fresh? (pauses)......
Ahhhh... Given the meager budget afforded by this household's quasi-peasant class taste, I assume I shall source the staple "ga-leewng-gong."
Am I correct?"


Inday nung nagrereklamo kasi ayaw siyang isama ng amo sa outing sa Enchanted Kingdom.

"Don't limit my capacity in the four corners of this luxurious abode. Expose me to the real challenges of the outside world. I want to grow as an individual with dynamic experiences."



Sinabi ni Inday sa amo niya noong di siya pinautang.

"Nurther others with positive, truthful words, not words that hurt. It doesn't cost anything to do so. But mean whay you say, and say what you mean. If you cannot be generous financially, at least be generous with your words."


Si Inday nong tumangging makipagtismisan sa katulong sa kabilang bahay!


"Much as I want to indulge in the proliferation of such indecent and malicious information, I want to lift the stigma and alleviate society's perception of our profession."


Pinagalitan ni Inday si Junior sa sobrang lapit manood ng TV.

"Did it ever occur to you that the ultraviolet rays of the idiot box can bring harmful radiation to the retinal area? It could lead to blurred vision, worse, permanent blindness?

Si Inday ng buhay natin

Isang buwan na rin akong napatawa ng mga statements ni Inday.

Ang balita ko may information officer daw itong si Inday na walang humpay na nagpapadala ng mga texts sa mga may cellphone sa buong Pinas.

Dati si Inday laging inaapi. Ngayon palaban na siya.

Imposibleng ni minsan hindi niyo na-encounter ang katarayan niya sa mga panahong ito.

Eto ang mga halimbawang explinasyon ni Inday sa lahat ng bagay.

"Ma'am / Sir,

I hereby tender my irrevocable resignation as your employee effective today. It has been a pleasant stay in your company, but owing to personal reasons, I am compelled to move on. I would like to thank you and your good management for the wonderful experience accorded to me during my stay in Your company.

Yours Truly,
Inday

Sulat in inday nang umalis say as dati nyang amo. . Lufeeeet !!!

* * *

Tapos eto sagot ni Inday sa interview ng bago niyang amo!

"I believe that my trained skills and expertise in management with the
Use of standard tools, and my discipline and experience will contribute
Significantly to the value of the work that you want, my creativity,
Productivity and work-efficiency and the high quality of outcomes I can
Offer will boost the work progress."

* * *

- sagot in Inday nang tanungin ng amo kung bakit may bukol is Junior.

"Compromising safety with useless aesthetics, the not-so-well engineered
Architectural design of our kitchen lavatory affected the boy's cranium
With a slight boil at the left temple near the auditory organ."

* * *

- nag-explain is Inday kung bakit maalat ang ulam.

"The consistency was fine. But you see, it seems that the increased
Amount of sodium chloride (NaCl) affected the taste drastically and those
Actions are irreversible. I do apologize."

* * *

Donya: Bakit tuwing paguwi ko, nadadatnan kitang nanunuod ng TV?!

Inday: Because I don't want you to see me doing absolutely nothing.

* * *

- Si Inday, kasama si Junior sa principal's office.

"It's absurd! It was never a fact that he will inflict a fight. I can
Only imagine how you handle schizophrenic kids on this educational
Institution. Revise your policies because they suck!"

* * *

Amo: Inday, bakit nagkalat ang basura as likod ng bahay?!

Inday: A change in the weather patterns might have occurred wrecking havoc
To the surroundings. The way the debris are scattered indicates that the
Gust of wind was going northeast causing damage to the path it was heading
For.

At biglang ng nosebleed ang Amo

* * *

Si Inday, pinagbabawalan ang mga bata na maglikot.

"Stop your raucous behavior. It is bound to result in property damages
And if that happens there will be corresponding punishment to be inflicted
upon you!"

* * *

Sagot ni Inday kung bakit umalis si Angel Locsin sa GMA7.

"Sometimes, people choose to leave not because of selfish reasons but
Because they just know that things will get worse if they'll stay.
Leaving can be a tough act, and it's harder when people can't understand
You for doing so."

* * *

Amo: Inday, Bakit Mo binenta ung sirang silya?

Inday : I computed the chair's fair value less cost to sell and the
Value in use using projections for 5 years at a pretax discount rate.
Accordingly, the value in use is lower, so I decided to sell the chair.
This is in accordance with PAS 18-Revenue, PAS 16-Property, Plant, &
Equipment, and PAS 36 on Impairment of Assets.

At hinimatay na ang amo ni Inday...

Mutiny

Sa mga hindi nakadalo kasama ang mga Magdalo.

Paid ad muna tayo.

MUTINY - where people drink, eat and talk about everything under the sun, except "mutiny."

The first advocacy bar in the Philippines, now on its dry run at the Aseana Power Station, Macapagal Boulevard in Parañaque City, beside McDo and Shell gas stations.

Open Monday to Saturday, from 5 p.m. to 2 a.m.

Sabi ng mga may-ari all food and drinks are at introductory prices!

Classified ads

Last week may pinagkakaguluhan ang mga tao sa Diwalwal, Comval.

Ang bida ng Black Hawk Down na si Josh Hartnett ay naibalitang nag sho-shooting doon.

Habang abala ang lahat masilayan ang Hollywood actor may mga entrepreneurs namang busy sa paglagay ng mga classified ads nila.

Pag may sira ang sapatos niyo wag magdalawang isip na tawagan si Dante.

Hindi ko nga lang alam kung si Dante ang mag re-refer sa pag repair ng shoes niyo o siya na mismo ang shoe repair boy. May number code kasi na nakapaloob sa ads niya, 202 raw. Sounds like sweetened o flavored fruit juice drink na Del Monte 202.

Tanong niyo na lang rin sa kanya, tutal tapos na rin naman ang barangay assembly nila.


.

Electric dreams

Last week pa siya nangungulit, tanong ng tanong kung kelan ako pupuntang Davao Light (our version of Meralco).

Eh sabi ko depende sa oras at kung hindi tamarin baka madadaanan ko rin.
Pababayaran ng Tita ko ang bill ng kuryente niya.

Years ago, nataranta din kami sa tawag sa telepono, nagmamadaling pabayaran ang electric bill niya.

Sabi ng kapatid ko iwan niya na lang muna sa isang tindahan yong bill tapos kami na kukuha at magbabayad.

Worried siya sa bill ha pero wala naman siyang TV sa bahay niya.
Electric fan at transistor radio lang.

Tapos lagi naman siyang nanood ng sine.
Suki na ata siya sa lahat ng cinema eh.
Sa gabi pag-uwi niya sa bahay, switch-on niya lang ilaw nang sandali sabay ayos ng tulugan niya tapos switch-off na rin agad.

At kahapon, after so many years, nagmamadali na naman syang pabayaran 'tong electric bill nya.




Akala ko notice of disconnection na.

Pakshet na yan P4.56 na naman bill niya.

Mahal pa pamasahe ng jeep ha! Kahit student fare or senior citizen fare pa.

Last time tumawag siya sa opisina, tarantang taranta at due date na raw, jusme P7.34 lang bill niya.

Last payment niya was June 18, 2006 and she paid an advance of P50.00.

Grrrrrr.

Noong huwebes, July 26, pinabayaran na naman niya ng advance P50.00 ulit, advance until 2008.